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Thursday, February 21, 2013

perfect imperfection

I laid on my living-room floor pondering what questions I may be asked in my upcoming interview. One question popped into my mind: 

"What makes me special, unique? What will I bring to the position, in way of diversity?"

As I came up with some obvious answers, my eyes glanced over my hands. I started inspecting them and identifying scars, lines, and all matter of details.

Then, the thought came to me: 

"When I die and am resurrected, as I was taught in the Mormon Church, my body will be perfected. What if there are parts of me I do not want perfected? If God has granted me my agency, will I be able to choose how perfect my body will become?"

Think about this; we live all our life with our imperfections, scars, idiosyncrasies, and disabilities. How will we react to all of this being taken away in a twinkling of an eye?

When a person has a leg or arm amputated, they usually have phantom pains or feelings as their brain is still trying to process the loss. How will our brain process regaining what we did not have or lost in this life, when we are resurrected?

The question of whether I will be able to choose how my body changes is not as important, but it is a curiosity that has suddenly awaken within.

I believe that in this life, one of our trials is to overcome the limits of our finite physical body. Everything from imperfections, desires, lusts, scars, disabilities, and body image. The challenge is to allow our infinite soul to take the lead, so that whatever changes may come through resurrection has no affect or effect to our spiritual journey, that is eternal.

We are not human beings having a spiritual experience; we are spiritual beings having a human experience. Pierre Teilhard de Chardin
You have been caught Jey Walking!


Dean said...

Fascinating questions - I have thought of them more in relation to being gay since the Mormon church's current stance is that the gay will be resurrected away. I do not want the gay resurrected away. It is an important part of how I think and what I do.

Jeff "Jey Walker" Gladstone said...

Wow, Dean, thank you for bringing that up. I guess I totally forgot about that part of my curiosity. Dallin H. Oaks said in an interview exactly what you said, that being gay would no longer be apart of who we are after this life.

I am not sure how I feel about it. Being gay, discovering my sexuality, seeing my life and my purpose through the lens of homosexuality - it really has made a difference.

Whether I am gay or not in the next life, after resurrection - my complete journey now on Earth will never be taken away from me. No matter what I learned, experience, suffered through, or enjoyed - those imprints have been made onto my mind and soul.

Not sure how it will all work, either way. Then again, I am not set on going to the Celestial Kingdom that Mormons believe in. I believe it exists, but I don't want to be somewhere I would feel out of place.

Dean said...

I really relate to your last paragraph of not wanting to be somewhere I would feel out of place. At this point I am trying to not judge myself or judge others. I am trying to be a good person and hope that God understands my heart.

Debra/Mom said...

That's all any of us can be is "a good person". We all have our demons. Whatever the case, we will all be resurrected. I just better NOT BE FAT!