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Tuesday, January 18, 2011

going backwards to move forward

A couple nights ago I had another one of my prescribed drug-induced dreams. This dream, unknown to me at the time, is presumably about the afterlife.

I was in a place that was serene and in the company of good people. In this place, people were on a type of a journey, traveling through all sorts of landscapes and constantly moving. I was also on this journey; my travel companions were a couple that were at least in the sixties and a younger child. I am not sure who these people represent, but we were connected and it seemed like the couple were my grandparents, but not necessarily the ones I knew in this life, which seems odd to me. Looking back on the dream it occurs to me that the younger child is probably a younger version of myself. The focus of the dream was on the relationship I had with this couple and our journey together.

As we journeyed through an assortment of lands the weather also began to change slightly, meaning clouds replaced blue skies and the wind picked up. Eventually we had to climb rough mountains, much like the ones from the Lord of the Rings movies. The weather remained relatively calm compared to how it looked, but the journey for the couple was not as easy as when we started in the beautiful valley.

I noticed something else change that was very odd. The couple began to age as we traveled and it became harder for them to make the journey, but the child and I remained the same age. For the child and myself, the journey's effort remained the same, almost as if we were only floating along as companions to the couple. I became very concerned about the couple's withered and worn out state, but there was nothing I could do to help them. Eventually, the older man smiled and slowly vanished before my eyes leaving behind a numbered ticket, similar to a large raffle ticket. I was told to hold on to the ticket until the time came to give it away. I was very sad and began to weep openly for what seemed to be a personal loss or death. The older woman began to well up with tears but quickly wiped them away and began to smile. She leaned toward me to tell me that he chose to leave because it was his time and that we shouldn't mourn his absence but move forward.

It then occurred to me that we had been traveling backwards the entire time and it was only until that time that the woman said we should move forward that we began to walk forward. As we walked forward the landscape became easier, the weather more serene and we eventually descended from the mountains back to the lush valley. Also, as we moved forward I looked back at the woman and she became younger than before. As we entered the valley we were met by another older man who greeted us with a smile and asked for the ticket I had been given to hold. I was very hesitant, but the woman gently reassured me that it was alright and that this is what I was meant to do. Then I felt a prompting to awake and ponder the dream.

Everything seemed to have a meaning and purpose. I still cannot fully explain what this dream means, but I know that this dream represents something special and important. When I have dreams similar to this one, I wake up with a feeling that I should write it down, study its meaning and share it with others here. I hope that something good comes from following such feelings. I believe that God had a hand in switching my medication so that I would have these types of dreams more often. Who knew having HIV would be some type of blessing? Maybe I'm wrong about this all and it really is just another crazy dream. You can decide for yourself; I'm not here to prove anything, but rather to share a story.

You have been caught Jey Walking!


J G-W said...

I wonder, can dreams be drug-induced, or do the drugs just make it easier for us to remember dreams? Everybody dreams every night -- several times! I have -- on rare occasions -- remembered as many as three dreams from one night, and recorded them all in my dream journal.

This is an amazing dream, so hopeful... I hope you figure out what it means!

Jeff "Jey Walker" Gladstone said...

Thanks again for your insight and support!